Written by: Lena Nguyen, Counselling Intern
Clinically reviewed by: Kim Kendall, RCC-ACS, BCRPT, SPT-S
As a parent, noticing changes in your child’s behaviour can feel overwhelming. Perhaps you’re seeing more frequent meltdowns, sudden aggression, heightened anxiety, or school avoidance. It’s natural to wonder whether counselling could help.
However, when you start researching options and hear the term play therapy, a common question arises: How can playing with toys actually help my child work through complex emotional struggles?
If you’ve undergone counselling yourself, you’re likely used to sitting down and talking through your thoughts with a counsellor. When you watch a young child enter a playroom full of toys, sand trays, and art supplies, it looks vastly different.
If you’ve got questions about how play therapy works, you’re not alone. In this post, we’ll explore what therapy is, how counselling differs between adults and children, and how two complementary approaches—Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT) and Synergetic Play Therapy (SPT)—work to support children.
What Is Therapy?
Therapy—also referred to as counselling or psychotherapy—is a safe, supportive space where individuals or families work alongside a trained counsellor to better understand their emotions, behaviours, and relationships.
Counselling provides a non-judgmental atmosphere that involves:
- Processing difficult experiences: Unpacking trauma, grief, or sudden life changes.
- Psychoeducation: Learning how mental health concerns like anxiety physically affect the brain and body.
- Skill development: Acquiring practical coping strategies for emotional regulation.
- Improving relationships: Strengthening communication and setting healthy boundaries.
What About Confidentiality?
Confidentiality forms the bedrock of any therapeutic relationship. What you share with your counsellor is kept private, with standard legal exceptions regarding safety risks (harm to self or others), child protection concerns, or court orders. Counsellors review these limits during intake so you understand what to expect.
What Does Therapy Look Like for Children?
Therapy with children looks significantly different from therapy with adults. Adults possess the abstract reasoning and vocabulary to articulate emotional distress. Children are still developing these capacities and often experience intense feelings without having the words to explain them.
Children naturally use play to communicate, explore, and make sense of their world. Instead of asking a child to sit down and talk, play counsellors use expressive modalities such as art, sand trays, figurines, role-playing, and movement to help them process complex emotions.
But Isn't It "Just Playing"?
While play therapy may look like an ordinary playdate from the outside, a trained play counsellor actively observes how the child interacts with materials, manages frustration, and responds to sensory input. The counsellor uses these real-time moments to support the child in developing new ways of responding. Play isn’t a distraction—it’s the therapeutic process itself.
Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT)
Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT) is a non-directive approach grounded in person-centred theory. In CCPT, the child takes the lead in choosing how to spend their time in the playroom. The counsellor’s role is to cultivate an environment characterized by total acceptance, empathy, and psychological safety.
| Core Condition | Clinical Purpose |
| Counsellor Authenticity | The counsellor engages transparently without a rigid clinical mask. |
| Unconditional Positive Regard | The child is fully accepted without judgment or conditions on behaviour. |
| Empathic Understanding | The counsellor reflects the child’s emotional reality from the child’s perspective. |
| Safety & Connection | A deep psychological bond gives the child space to explore vulnerable feelings. |
CCPT operates on the belief that children possess an innate drive toward growth. When provided with a secure environment, they naturally process difficult experiences and develop healthier coping strategies.
Synergetic Play Therapy (SPT)
Synergetic Play Therapy (SPT) combines directive and non-directive techniques with insights from interpersonal neurobiology, attachment, and nervous system regulation.
In SPT, outward behaviours—such as aggression, meltdowns, or withdrawal—are understood through the lens of nervous system arousal. When a child’s system becomes overwhelmed, their ability to regulate breaks down. Rather than focusing solely on stopping the behaviour, an SPT counsellor works to support the underlying nervous system state.
The Role of Co-Regulation
Co-regulation occurs when one person’s calm, grounded state helps stabilize another person’s dysregulated system. In SPT, the clinician uses their own nervous system as an anchor:
- Mindful Self-Awareness: The counsellor tracks their own somatic responses and breath during high-arousal play.
- Authentic Presence: The counsellor stays present with the child’s intense feelings without becoming overwhelmed.
- Interpersonal Connection: The child learns to tolerate uncomfortable bodily sensations without escalating into distress.
Exploring CCPT and Synergetic Play Therapy
Both CCPT and SPT share a deep respect for the child’s inner world and offer evidence-based pathways for emotional healing. Depending on a child’s unique personality and needs, a counsellor might lean into one approach or blend elements of both:
- Session Direction: CCPT is primarily non-directive, giving full control to the child. SPT blends non-directive play with gentle, counsellor-guided somatic and co-regulatory support when helpful.
- Body & Nervous System Focus: CCPT emphasizes emotional reflection and relational safety. SPT integrates nervous system arousal, helping children connect physical sensations directly to their feelings.
- Counsellor Integration: In CCPT, the counsellor acts as an empathetic reflector. In SPT, the counsellor actively models regulation, movement, and breath alongside the child in real time.
What Can Play Therapy Help With?
Play therapy effectively supports children navigating a wide range of social, emotional, and behavioural challenges, including:
- Anxiety, phobias, and emotional regulation
- Aggression, meltdowns, and big emotions
- School difficulties and school avoidance
- Grief, loss, and family transitions
- ADHD-related challenges and impulse control
How Long Does Play Therapy Take?
Because every child’s temperament and life experiences are unique, there’s no set timeline. Some children benefit from short-term support over a few months, while others need longer-term therapy.
Parents and caregivers are an essential part of this process. Counsellors often schedule periodic parent consultation sessions to discuss progress and share strategies to reinforce co-regulation at home.
Supporting Your Child Through the Process
Starting therapy for your child naturally comes with questions. Whether your child’s counsellor utilizes Child-Centred Play Therapy, Synergetic Play Therapy, or an integrative approach combining both, the goal remains consistent: providing a safe relationship where your child feels understood, supported, and empowered to grow.
And sometimes, that transformative work looks a lot like play.
References
- American Psychiatric Association. (n.d.). What is Psychotherapy? https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/psychotherapy
- GoodTherapy. (n.d.). What is Therapy? https://www.goodtherapy.org/what-is-therapy.html
- KidsHealth. (n.d.). Finding a Therapist for Your Child. https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/finding-therapist.html
- Simmons, J. (2020). Moving Toward Regulation Using Synergetic Play Therapy. Canadian Journal of Counselling and Psychotherapy, 54(3), 242–258.
- Synergetic Play Therapy Institute. (n.d.). What is Synergetic Play Therapy? https://synergeticplaytherapy.com/what-is-synergetic-play-therapy/
- Taylor, J. L., & Ray, D. C. (2026). Child-centered play therapy and child–parent relationship therapy effects on internalizing problems: A meta-analysis. International Journal of Play Therapy, 35(1–2), 1–16. https://doi.org/10.1037/pla0000250
- Townsend, B. J., Ishman, L., Dion, L., & Carnes-Holt, K. L. (2021). An examination of child-centered play therapy and synergetic play therapy. Journal of Child and Adolescent Counseling, 7(3), 193–206. https://doi.org/10.1080/23727810.2021.1964931
About the Author
Lena Nguyen is a Counselling Intern at Achieve Balance Counselling who is passionate about supporting children, youth, adults, couples, and families. She is completing her Master of Arts in Couple and Family Therapy at Trinity Western University and has a special interest in helping clients build resilience, strengthen relationships, and navigate life’s challenges with compassion and evidence-informed care.
This article was clinically reviewed for accuracy by Kim Kendall, RCC-ACS, BCRPT, SPT-S, Founder & Clinical Director of Achieve Balance Counselling.